Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Sunday, November 20, 2011
عند احتراق لمبة ماذا يحدث فى كل دول العالم - طريفة جدا
لو لمبة اتحرقت هيكون تصرف الناس معاها ايه؟؟ الإجابة البديهيه ان الناس هتغيرها، لكن ثبت بالتجربة ان الإجابة دى مش وافية لأن تصرف الناس مع اللمبة هيختلف حسب مكانهم ثقافتهم فمثلا: فى العراق لما ناس بتتحرق فى بيتهم لمبة بينزلوا يخطفوا اول اجنبى يقابلوه ويطلبوا من بلده تبعت لمبة جديدة مع واحد يغيرها علشان يفرجوا عن المخطوف فى انجلترا لو واحد اتحرقت فى بيته لمبة بيتصل بمندوب حلف الأطلنطى علشان ياخد اذن بتركيب لمبة جديدة فى السودان واحد هايمسك اللمبة وخمسة يلفوا السقف فى الصين لما واحد بتتحرق فى بيته لمبه، بيدخل كل البيوت اللى فى شارعهم ويبص تحت السلم، لحد ما يلاقى السلم الى فيه ناس قاعدة تحتيه بتصنع لمبات، ياخد منهم لمبة علشان يغيرها، يديلهم بدالها ساعة من اللى هو بيعملها تحت السلم فى بيته فى اليمن لما واحد بتتحرق فى بيته لمبة بيقعد يخزن قات لحد ما يبقى شايف ان اللمبة اتغيرت لوحدها فى الخليج لما واحد بتتحرق فى بيته لمبة بيطلب من الشغالة الفلبينية انها تبعت السواق الباكستانى يجيب صنايعى هندى يغير له كل اللمبات الى فى البيت فى لبنان علشان واحد يغير لمبة محروقة لازم واحد تانى يولعله الأرجيلة (الشيشة) وواحدة تغنى للإتنين وواحد ينزل يجيب ومعسل وسجاير للتلاتة علشان كله يعدل مزاجه قبل الشغل فى اللمبة في ليبيا لو اللمبة اتحرقت بيراجعوا الكتاب الأخضر ويشوفوا فبه تعليمات تغيير لمبة فى الجماهيرية فى الصومال لما لمبة بتتحرق ماحدش بينتبه للموضوع دا علشان ماعندهمش كهربا أصلا فى المغرب لما لمبة بتتحرق فى بيت واحد بيروح مسافر فرنسا يشتغل فى المينا هناك أسبوع ويرجع بكرتونة لمبات فى أيده فى ايران لما واحد بتتحرق فى بيته لمبة كهربا بيخرج ينضم للمظاهرات علشان يطالب بحقه فى لمبة نووية فى سوريا لما بتتحرق لمبة بيعملولها استفتاء وتطلع النتيجة ان اللمبة شغالة بنسبة 99.999% ويعملوا احتفال قومى للوصول للنسبة دى، ولو مافيش ميزانيه للإستفتاء يطلع خبر فى الجرايد تانى يوم ان اللمبة انتحرت علشان حست إنها مقصرة فى أداء واجبها القومى فى مصر أى عيل صغير ممكن يغير لمبة ويدور على مين يدفع تمن اللمبة فى إسرائيل لما لمبة بتتحرق بيقولو ان الإرهابيين الفلسطينين هما اللى حرقوها ويطلبو من امريكا انها تبعت لهم بدالها ألف لمبة جديدة وكمان شوية صواريخ وطيارات علشان يقوموا بواجبهم فى الحرب على الإرهاب وينسفوا بيوت الناس اللى حرقوا اللمبة فى فرنسا لما لمبة بتتحرق بياخدوها يعملوها إزازة بارفان وطبعا كل الناس بتقلدهم بعد كدة وتبقى موضة فى أمريكا الجنوبية لما واحد بتتحرق فى بيته لمبة بياخد جماعة من أصحابه وكام مدفع رشاش ويلبسو صاعقة ويطلعوا على قصر الرياسة يعملوا انقلاب ويخلعوا الريس ويمسكوا الحكم ويكلفو الجيش انه يغير اللمبات المحروقة اللى عندهم كلها بسرعة قبل ما واحد تانى تتحرقله لمبة وييجى يخلعهم فى الولايات المتحدة الأمريكية لما واحد بتتحرق فى بيته لمبة بيتهموا حزب القاعدة بإنه السبب الرئيسى فى حرق هذه اللمبة وعلى هذا الأساس سيتم ارسال قوة حربية مؤلفة من 2000 دبابة مدعومة بـ 243000 من مشاة البحرية و غطاء جوي مؤلف من 846 قاذفة مهمتها البحث والعثور على المجرم الإرهابى الذى فعلة هذه الفعلة الشنيعة وسيتم نشر قواعد عسكرية فى جميع بلدان الشرق الأوسط للبحث والتحرى وسيتم إرسال مفتشين دوليين للتأكد من أن جميع دول الشرق الأوسط لا يوجد بها لمبة محروقة وسيتم احتلال أى دولة إذا تم التأكد من وجود لمبة محروقة باعتبار أن حكوماتها غير قادرة على إيجاد من يغير هذه اللمبة |
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
أم تروج الملابس الداخلية مع ابنتها بشكل مستفز
وصف الكثير ان الحملة الأخيرة لشركة للملابس الداخلية مستفزة فقد قدمت الشركة إعلانًا يضم أم وابنتها، 19 عامًا وهما ترتديان الملابس القديمة، وتتعانقان بشكل استفزازي،
قالت الشركة، "إن هذه العارضة ليست محترفة"، وقالت "إن الفتاة وأمها مجرد شخصين عاديين، يعيشان في المنزل المجاور للشركة في بروكلين، في نيويورك".
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Very Beautiful two naked women Breasts in the Street in the Spring
First Sign of Spring XXX
First Sign of Spring
I saw the first sign of spring on a walk recently.
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Friday, November 11, 2011
Thursday, November 10, 2011
The Right Door is for your Healthy Heart Watch
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Wednesday, November 9, 2011
100 Cool Things About Being A Man not ( Guys are Best )
1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
2. Movie nudity is virtually always female.
3. You know stuff about tanks.
4. A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase.
5. Monday Night Football.
6. You don't have to monitor your friends' sex lives.
7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
8. You can open all of your own jars.
9. Old friends don't give a crap whether you've lost or gained weight.
10. Dry cleaners and haircutters don't rob you blind.
11. When clicking through the channels, you don't have to stall at every shot of somebody crying.
12. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
13. All your orgasms are real.
14. A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex.
15. Guy in hockey masks don't attack you ... unless you're playing hockey.
16. You don't have to lug a bag full of stuff around everywhere you go.
17. You understand why the movie "Stripes" is funny.
18. You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
19. Your last name stays put.
20. You can leave the hotel bed unmade.
21. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone secretly hates you.
22. You can kill your own food.
23. The garage is all yours.
24. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
25. You see the humor in "Terms of Endearment."
26. Nobody secretly wonders whether you swallow.
27. You never have to clean a toilet.
28. You can be showered and ready to go in 10 minutes.
29. Sex means never worrying about your reputation.
30. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
31. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.
32. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
33. The National College Cheerleading Championship
34. None of your coworkers has the power to make you cry.
35. You don't have to shave below your neck.
36. You don't have to curl up next to a hairy butt every night.
37. If you're 34 and single, nobody even notices.
38. You can write your name in the snow.
39. You can get into a nontrivial pissing contest.
40. Everything on your face gets to stay its original color.
41. Chocolate is just another snack.
42. You can be president.
43. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
44. Flowers fix everything.
45. You never have to worry about other people's feelings.
46. You get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours.
47. You can wear a white shirt to a water park.
48. Three pairs of shoes is more than enough.
49. You can eat a banana in a hardware store.
50. You can say anything and not worry about what people think.
51. Foreplay is optional.
52. Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe.
53. Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk into a room.
54. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day. 55. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader's coming by.
56. You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid.
57. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
58. You don't give a rat's butt if anyone notices your new haircut.
59. You can quietly watch a game with you buddy for hours without ever thinking, "He must be mad at me."
60. The world is your urinal.
61. You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover's about to leave you.
62. You get to jump up and slap stuff.
63. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
64. One mood, all the time.
65. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.
66. You never have to drive on to another gas station because "this one's just too gross."
67. You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.
68. You can sit with you knees apart no matter what you're wearing.
69. Same work...more pay!
70. Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.
71. You don't have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment.
72. Wedding dress: $2,000; tuxedo rental: $75.
73. You don't care if someone's talking about you behind your back.
74. With 400 million sperm per shot, you could double the Earth's population in 15 tries, at least in theory.
75. You don't mooch off of other's desserts. 76. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
77. The remote control is yours and yours alone.
78. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
79. ESPN's SportsCenter.
80. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
81. Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers.
82. You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother.
83. You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.
84. You needn't pretend you're "Freshening up" to go to the bathroom.
85. If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, he won't tell your other friends you've changed.
86. Someday you'll be a dirty old man.
87. You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "Screw it."
88. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong buddies.
89. Princess Di's death was just another obituary.
90. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
91. You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood.
92. You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.
93. If something mechanical doesn't work, you can bash it with a hammer or throw it across the room.
94. New shoes don't blister, cut, and mangle your feet.
95. Porn movies are designed with your mind in mind.
96. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries.
97. Not liking a person won't stop you from having great sex with them.
98. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So...notice anything different?"
99. Baywatch
100. There's always a game on somewhere.
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Do you know ? - Very Special Strange informations
Do you know?
If you are right handed, you will tend to chew your food on the right side of your mouth. If you are left handed, you will tend to chew your food on the left side of your mouth.
Each year 2,000,000 smokers either quit smoking or die of tobacco-related diseases.Saturday, November 5, 2011
Reasons We Love Google Logo :"-) by images
http://www.mr-funny.com/index.php/en/pictures-b/954-reason-we-love-google-logo-q-.html
ayman
ayman
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- Bear is My Friend ( Unusual Friendship )
- Middle East Girls can do duck lips also
- Female Bodies Shapes and Figures by images
- Beautiful Kissing Cats
- Some Quotes which I believe in
- Do you know ? - Very Special Strange informations
- Marketing Concepts Examples for MBA Students
- Thought for the Day !!
- Retired husband Joke - Short Story
- RE: Delivery Status: Awaiting Delivery Address Re-...
- Reasons We Love Google Logo :"-) by images
- Why Are Women Bad Drivers images
- Celebrities Who Are Now Nobodies - Avalanchers
- Seriously. Don't Wake Me Up. Funny
Friday, November 4, 2011
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